How long do you leave moisturiser on your face?

Alright, fellas, let's cut to the chase. We're not here for a skincare 101 lecture or a beauty regimen that rivals a spa day. We're here to answer one burning question that's been on the minds of men who give a damn about their mug: How long do you leave moisturiser on your face? Buckle up, because we're about to break it down, no fluff, no nonsense.

1.) The Quick Splash-and-Dash Myth:
Some guys think they can pull off a quick splash of water, slap on some moisturiser, and be on their merry way. Well, hate to break it to you, but that's the equivalent of a one-ply paper towel trying to handle a grease spill – it just ain't cutting it. Moisturising is a commitment, and if you want results, you gotta put in the time.

2.) The Pre-Game Prep:
Before you even think about moisturising, make sure your face is clean. We're talking about a face wash that could strip paint, not a gentle rubdown with a wet napkin. Get rid of the grime and the day's battle scars. Your face is a canvas, and you want it ready for the masterpiece – that's where the moisturiser comes in.

3.) The Two-Minute Rule:
Alright, here's the golden rule, gentlemen: Two minutes. Yeah, you heard it right – just two measly minutes. That's all it takes to transform your skin from a barren wasteland to a hydrated haven. Apply that moisturiser like you mean it, massage it in, and let it do its thing. Don't be stingy; your face deserves the full treatment.

4.) Multi-Tasking Mastery:
Now, some of you might be wondering, "Can I just slap it on and move on with my life?" Well, you could, but why not make those two minutes count? Use it as a moment of self-reflection, ponder the mysteries of the universe, or plan your conquest for the day. Multi-tasking, my friend, that's the key.

5.) The Overnight Power Move:
If you're feeling extra ambitious, consider the overnight power move. Slather on a thicker moisturiser before hitting the hay, and let it work its magic. Wake up with skin that feels like it just had a spa day – your face will thank you.

In the grand scheme of things, two minutes isn't much to ask. Your face does a lot for you – it's time to return the favor. So, the next time you ask yourself, "How long do you leave moisturiser on your face?" remember this: two minutes may just be the game-changer your face has been waiting for. Embrace the ritual, let the moisturiser work its wonders, and face the world with a mug that says, "I've got this."